The Little Tree That Could

When the world says "Give Up",

Hope whispers "Try it one more time." 

-- author unknown --

Over the July 4th weekend, my neighbor had a garage fire that totally destroyed the garage and destroyed a lot of their belongings they had stored there.  The fire also damaged a portion of my garden.  I blogged about it here.  This week, the owner's insurance adjuster told me there was nothing in the owner's policy that would cover the actions of his tenant.  So there was nothing that they would be doing to repair the damage to my garden. 

After feeling sorry for myself for a couple of days, this evening I took another look at the garden.  

A couple weeks ago, I was convinced this hydrangea was a goner.

But this evening, there is hope.  I see growth.  I see promise. 

It may not be this year, but I'm sure next year, it will end up looking more like it used to.

Same with the ornamental pear trees --  What started off like this a couple weeks ago:

is showing signs of new growth amid the burned and charred branches and leaves.

I now envision my tree saying to itself, "I think I can, I think I can, I KNOW I can."

What's not to love about the perseverance of nature?  Maybe we could all use this lesson at some time in our lives!!

Where flowers bloom, so does hope.

-- Lady Bird Johnson --

Don't Worry, Be Happy!

Are you a worrier?  Do you worry about how your kids are doing in school?  About your health?  About how you are going to pay the bills?  Oh, the list can go on and on, can't it?  So now that you've answered what it is you worry about, let me ask you this... How's that workin' for you??

"Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow."

I used to worry more when I was younger.  Not a lot, but more than I do now.  Most of the time, it had to do with me being a perfectionist.  I am always harder on myself than anyone else could or would ever be.  I finally learned to ask myself this question when I realized I was worrying about something: "If I died tomorrow, is this what they would put on your gravestone?"  Somehow, as morbid as it sounds, that put everything in perspective for me.  Think about that question.  I would love my epitaph to be something like this:  Mom, Grandma, Sister, Lover, Friend - She excelled in those roles, the most important in her life. 

The only thing worry does for me is to give me a better idea of what's important to me.  Worrying about my kids doesn't prove to them I love them.  But showing them I have confidence in their decisions does.  Worrying about my health doesn't change the issue.  Talking about, and doing, what I need to do to change it does.  I know what I'm saying can sound cavalier to some.  I think some people are hardwired to worry.  But if you really think about what you accomplish by worrying, you'll realize you can take away its power.  You'll no longer say, "I can't help it.  I worry."

So for all those worriers out there, I'm going to offer the wise words of Leo Buscaglia,

"Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow,
it only saps today of its joy."

What about you?  Do you worry? 

Creativity - Are You In????

Well, we've finished installing the shelving in the craft closet, so I can start to get my craft room back in order.  And just in the nick of time.  You see, a fellow blogger has issued a challenge.  Leslie at Words of Me Project has proposed a creativity challenge that will last for 31 days beginning on July 26.  During those 31 days, we are to do something creative every day.  Whether it's writing in your journal, scrapbooking or cardmaking, painting (yes, painting walls counts), gardening, photography or whatever else is in your creative veins.  Maybe it's a little bit of each. 

By the end of the 31 days, by taking the time to care for yourself, you are happier and healthier for it.  How can you go wrong??

So I'm in!!  I'm going to spend 31 days finding something creative to do, each and every day.  It might be taking some pictures, or creating some cards, or penning some deep thoughts!!  And I'll post some of it here. 

Would you like to join in this challenge??

OH, and along with my search for a new look to my blog, I've been encouraged by Leanne at From Chaos Comes Happiness to add a button.  She's the genius behind making buttons work, so I'll need her help to make this happen.  Watch for my button in the next day or two!!  It'll look something like this:

I guess I'm getting a head start on this creativity challenge!!

After Awhile You Learn

Going thru piles of old papers, shredding/recycling most of it, I came across this poem that my daughter emailed to me back in 1998, when she was a freshman in college.  Her note attached said it made her think of two people, me and her English IV teacher.  I wanted to share this with you.  I found it comforting:

After awhile you learn 

that what you really are

 is all the experiences

 and all the thoughts

 you've ever had

 and all the people

 who have touched your life,

 no matter how briefly.

And after awhile you learn

 that troubles are temporary

 and relationships

 aren't always permanent. 

You learn that many people

come into your life

and fade into forgetfulness,

while others remain

as warm places in your heart. 

You learn to forgive the bad times

and overcome the resentments.

And you learn to live

with love in your heart

for the good times

and for good friends

who may not be present,

but who never go away,

because the warmth of their friendship

and their essence lives within you

and becomes a part of what you are."

I've searched and can't find the author, so if anyone knows, please let me know. I'd be happy to add the credit!

Through the Camera's Lens

As I mentioned previously, I'm taking a class at Big Picture Scrapbooking called Picture Spring.  In this class, we receive a prompt every day to look at things in your life with a new eye, and find the beauty in it to photograph.  Everything was going along great, I was having a lot of fun looking at my life each day.  One day you take a picture of what your life looks like first thing in the a.m.

Another day, you had to look up and find the beauty above you. 

Still another day, you had to drop to ground level to find what rocks your world.

And then...the dreaded "SELF-PORTRAIT" day came.  How many of us dread this challenge??  Tracey's email said "Spring is the season of renewal and rejuvenation. Beyond the blooms, our spirits feel alive! Today, as you soak it all in, capture yourself in a self-portrait. Celebrate yourself! You're worth the hoop-lah!"..... Right!!!! 

But I refused to be intimidated.  My reasoning to take this class was to grow in my photography skills.  I needed to do this!!

So I stood in front of a mirror and turned my camera around and snapped away.  I took countless pictures.  And I give to you, a cropped version of the picture I submitted for the class.  

I really don't like looking at pictures of myself but I have spent part of this morning thinking about why that is.  And I've come to the conclusion that it has a lot to do with your life as you are growing up.  I think many of us are told that it is vain if we like to look at ourselves.  Vanity was sinful, as I recall.  Isn't that interesting??  Because I am of the belief that in order to love another, you must love yourself.  Maybe you can love yourself and not like looking at yourself.  Is that it??  

So after all my pondering this morning, and actually looking more closely at this picture, I've decided that those little crows' feet around my eyes are caused by the laughter in my life.  So I will wear those crows' feet as a badge of honor, that I have a wonderful, laughter-filled, joyous life.  A life that brings me peace and serenity.  A life I am delighted to express gratitude for.   

Are you like me?  Do you dislike looking at pictures of yourself, but truly enjoy your life and all the laughter in it?  Maybe all it takes is a change of attitude!  Thanks for stopping by today.    

Happy Birthday, Dad!!

Today, I'm celebrating.  I'm celebrating my outlook on life.  I'm celebrating friendships.  I'm celebrating laughter.  I'm celebrating family.  Today, I'm celebrating my Dad's birthday.  He would have been 96 today.  And although he passed away in 1975, I do celebrate his birthday every year.  Because I strongly believe my love of life, my love of family, my friendships and how dear they are to me, have all been influenced by my Dad.  The way he lived his life serves as a beacon to guide me in the way I live mine.  So today, I celebrate...

I celebrate Dad's love of family. 

He worked as a shipping supervisor for a pharmaceutical company.  You can imagine the pay wasn't that great.  But he managed to proudly support his family of 7 kids with that job.  No handouts from the government.  He was the sole breadwinner for many years.  As I've been digging thru old documents and pictures, I see how he managed it.  I find budget envelopes.  I find bank books with weekly deposits.  Simply amazing to me!!!

I celebrate his love of country. 

Dad proudly served in the Navy during World War II.  Even though he was married with a child on the way, he did what every proud American did back then.  He joined to protect our nation and our rights.

I celebrate his love of life. 

See that twinkle in his eye?  I was lucky enough to experience that most mornings after I graduated high school.  Dad and I were early risers.  So many mornings, we sat at the kitchen table chatting over our first cup of the day.  And I would love to look into his eyes as he talked.  They would twinkle, the same way you would think of a leprechaun's twinkle.  It actually set the tone for the day.  And I honestly can't think of a time it wasn't like that.  He just loved life. 

I celebrate his love of laughter,

whether it was he who laughed, or he who made others laugh. 

When we were lucky enough to have Dad join us for dinner (usually it was only Sundays and holidays), he would always come up with at least one very corny joke.  Of course, I usually laughed my butt off, because I saw the sillier side of Dad.  And, again, watching his face I could tell the punchline was going to be a silly one.  So I was ready for it.  And I think I enjoyed it all the more because of it.  He just loved to make people laugh.  I have no idea what he was trying to say in this picture, but I can tell you it was in the early to mid 40s and clearly he's clowning about being a sheik or something. But I have no doubt he entertained those he was with. 

I celebrate an all around good guy.  

When my Dad worked for Montgomery Wards as a Santa one year, all I could think about was how perfect he was for the job.  After all, we know Santa has a twinkle in his eye, right?  He really enjoyed this gig.  Once again, he just really enjoyed life.

So that gives you a little glimpse of my Dad, who would have been 96 today. 

One final note:  When my Dad passed away, his wake was not a somber event.  I looked around the room at the funeral home and listened to the chatter.  It actually had a party atmosphere to it.  And I remember thinking, This is exactly how Dad would have wanted it.  Celebrating his life, not mourning his death.  The procession of cars from the church to the cemetery was at least 2 miles long.  It really spoke to just how many lives this wonderful man had an effect on.  And I was lucky enough to call him Dad.   

Catchin' Up!

I know it's been way too long since I've posted.  As my good friend and fellow blogger mentioned in this post, I too am multi-creatively challenged.  When one aspect of my creativity is in full force, the others seem to take a back seat. 

So let me catch you up on some of the items for posts that I started but never finished. 

• Recently, we received news that an incredibly passionate former high school English teacher had passed away after a valiant fight against pancreatic cancer.  When I heard of his passing, I reflected on my interactions with him since both my kids had him for English, plus he was the girls' gymnastics coach for a couple of the years that my daughter was on the team.  And I realize he was a good man, who would do the right thing and wanted nothing more than for his students to learn the wonderful world of literature and writing.  He truly was an inspiration to the students and teachers of East Leyden and will be missed.
• On the way to my -- wait for it -- Ahhhhhhh! Scrap Day at the Cellar, I was behind a vehicle with a tire attached to the back door.  I was so inspired, I had to take a picture of it.  Yes, I did what you are probably thinking...I propped the camera on my dash and as I drove, I snapped pics.  But honestly, look at this picture...doesn't it look like a happy face (see the eyes, nose and smile) with arms and legs, even two ears???  Okay, call me crazy.  But it put me in a jolly mood for my ride to New Lenox. 
• Tomorrow is Martin Luther King Day.  I've always been fascinated by the man.  There was a time when I thought that he was only speaking to "his people".  Then I took the time to look at his "I have a dream" speech.  (To be honest, as I type this I am emotional).  This was an incredibly amazing man.  One line in his speech that doesn't get as much play time is "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."  Think about that.  Content of Character.  Isn't that what good parenting is all about??  Making sure we raise our kids with integrity, compassion, sensibility.  Content of character. I think if today's politicians spent more time working on their own content of character, our nation would be in better shape.  MLK photo courtesy of eis.rbbcsc.k12.in.us
• On Tuesday, the love of my life if going in for rotator cuff surgery.  He's my rock; always by my side through the many surgeries I've gone through since I've known him.  He's such a healthy guy that this is a new experience for us.  Please keep him and his speedy recovery in your prayers.
• Some food for thought - The reason that some of your thoughts haven't yet become things is because other thoughts of yours have. 
• Haven't done a whole lot with searching for serenity this week.  But I do have this constant reminder sitting on a bookshelf looking right at me!!  Picked it up on a side trip we took when we went to Branson, MO in 2003.  I just love it!

It's going to be important this week, for me to look for the serenity in my life.  Sometimes it's in simple words.  The word RAINBOW offers that.  Same with ANGEL,  So what words instill serenity in YOUR life?

A Decade in Review

I was chatting with my girlfriend on Sunday, talking about the crazy medical issues that have hit our families in the last two weeks.  We both mentioned that, due to the rocky start, we either want 2010 to be over or maybe just start February now...fresh start. 

It made me think about all the things that have happened in my life during the "aughts".  To wrap it up in a neat little package, let's just say that I come out of this decade with bones repaired, bones removed,

a bachelor's degree

a couple new family members

(my son-in-law

and my #2 grandson),

the opportunity to call myself a two-time cancer survivor,

additional nieces and nephews by way of marriage,

   

 a job lost,

a job gained,

weight lost, weight gained, much more serenity than I had going into the decade and gratitude for each and every day of my life.  All in all, a good decade.  Of course, I choose to focus on the positive.  Focusing on the negative only accentuates the negative.  To what end, I ask??  I'm 10 years older than I was at the beginning of that decade.  That's 10 years more of experience and wisdom.  I'll take it!!!

I really do have a good life.  Looking forward to seeing how good it gets in February!! 

Venus vs. Mars

Venus vs. Mars

Women vs. Men

Little displays of affection daily vs. Big displays weekly

Fix it vs. Understand it

I've given a lot of thought lately on why men (generally) don't seem to be as willing or able to deal with hurtful things in their lives.  Recent events have prompted me to give some thought, ask some advice, get some opinions on how things are sometimes, most times, vastly different between the sexes.  Some things I've read in the past pretty much state that men are fixers.  And it's sometimes too darned hard to "fix" the hurtful things in their lives.  What's so amazing to me is that some of the hurt is actually brought on by their actions (or inactions).

At first, I thought it was more isolated in its occurrence.

Not so.  Over and over I hear from Venus that "that's a guy thing!!"  And the more I think about it, I am agreeing. 

Venus (women) complain about their problems because they want to be "heard".  Mars (men) complain about their problems because they want them "fixed".  How many times have you (or the woman in your life, men) said, "I don't want you to fix this.  I just need to vent."? 

A generalized conversation: 

He: "How was work?"

She: "You're not going to believe this.  Do you know what Jane Doe said today?  She said to me, blah, blah, blah."

He:  "Well, did you tell her that she was wrong?  Did you point out to her how many times she's done the same in the past?"

She:  "I'm not telling you in order to find a solution to fix it.  I'm just telling you about my day." 

Sound familiar??  So here's the short version of what I'm saying...

Men -- When she talks, before you offer a solution, ASK if she's looking for a fix.

Women -- Before you talk, TELL him you aren't looking for a fix.  You just need to vent.   

Men -- When she asks for a fix, don't always think you're the one to fix it.

Women -- It's not always easy for him to admit he's not able to fix it.  Give him a little room to realize that he needs to call in the professional. 

Picture (in public domain) obtained from wikipedia.com:  Venus and Mars by Sandro Botticelli-1483

Adoring Eyes

Two unrelated stories...yet here I go connecting the dots.

1) As I mentioned in yesterday's post, my younger grandson is at the age where he adores his parents.  Even goes so far as telling his mom she's pretty when she gets a little dressed up (y'know...like maybe putting on earrings or a necklace). 

2) In talking with a coworker this week, we were discussing how her son finally "got it" when he realized that "Gee, Mom really DOES know a thing or two about how and why coaches treat players the way they do". 

It brought to mind the thoughts of Mark Twain:  "When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he learned in seven years."

Or this piece entitled "The Images of Mother"

Age 4: "My Mommy can do anything!"

Age 8: "My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!"

Age 12: "My Mom doesn't really know quite everything."

Age 14: "Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either."

Age 16: "Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned."

Age 18: "That old woman? She's way out of date!"

Age 25: "Well, she might know a little bit about it."

Age 35: "Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion."

Age 45: "Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?"

Age 55: "Wish I could talk it over with Mom."

I know it's part of growing up, but isn't it just a shame that it has to be that way?  I don't think I know anyone who hasn't gone thru that with their kids or grandkids.  And I know it's necessary for kids to develop their independence.  My kids used to roll their eyes.  Now, I notice that they are silent with regard to "my ignorance".  Over the last six months, I've gradually watched my older grandson work his way to thinking that his grandparents really don't know everything.  Won't be long before the eyes begin to roll whenever I open my mouth.  Hmmm..... I liked it better when the look in his eyes melted my heart.  If yours are little, enjoy the adornment in their eyes.  It won't last!!

Friends and Inspiration...From a Cellar

Ahhhhh..... I spent last Saturday in the cellar, and I feel refreshed, inspired and incredibly grateful for very talented friends!!  The cellar is what we have affectionately labeled my girlfriend's basement.  The formal name is "Scrapbook Cellar".  We try to meet there once every 4-6 weeks to scrap for the day, without having to pay the fees they want in all day scraps at stores (where you always spend more money).  The nice thing is we inspire and energize each other.  This time, I learned how to quickly scrapbook 30 random pictures.  It's like a lightbulb went off in my head!!  A real "duh" moment....why hadn't I thought of that sooner!!

Robert Louis Stevenson said "A friend is a present you give yourself."  I hope you have friends in your life who listen to you, advise you, inspire you, laugh with you, act as your cheerleaders when you aren't quite sure, and let you know they are there when you need them most. I'm so grateful that I do. (And grateful to certain spouses who do lunch runs!! - Thanks, CT).

Cherokee Wisdom

Got this in an email...thought it was profound. Let me know what you think.

One evening, an old Cherokee told his grandson about the battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all. One is evil -- It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other is good -- it is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?" The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."  (photo courtesy of http://animal.nationalgeographic.com)

Sending happy birthday wishes to my beautiful daughter, Christine!!  You have brightened my life more than I can express in words.  I thank God for the experience and honor of being your mother.